fearfully & wonderfully made

psalm 139 is an encouraging reminder of the Lord's greatest gift, allowing us to know Him. but still, he knows ME and he knows me because he has searched me. i was fearfully and wonderfully made, i cannot count the number of times i heard that growing up in church. and while i could never tire of being reminded of that beautiful truth, this morning i desired to dig deeper. what exactly does it mean to be fearfully and wonderfully made? it turns out that fearfully comes from the greek word yare' , a verb literally meaning, to cause astonishment and awe OR to inspire Godly fear or awe. We were made to bare the image of God, created to cause astonishment by our way of living and in turn inspire reverence toward our creator. but wonderfully didn't seem too difficult to comprehend. from simply reading the verse i assumed it to be synonymous with words like beautiful or flawless, but boy was i wrong. it has nothing to do with looks or our physical make up at all. rather, palah, the word originally used, means to be set apart or distinguished. verse 14 gained so much more depth and relevance for me this morning. being fearfully and wonderfully made has nothing to do with the fleeting condition of our physical bodies, but rather with the purpose we were created for. it matters not what we look like or what our current physical condition may be. for these things dont alter the ability to be an image barer of Christ and to ultimately carry out our purpose for being created and i thank God for that.

also...

psalm 139:23 is my constant prayer in times like these where my last year of college is already going by too fast and life as an adult approaches rather quickly. it is so bittersweet and my mind could be occupied for hours exploring possibilities. but instead of spending countless hours worrying, i can find rest in giving my anxious thoughts over to the Lord, trusting in His way above my own and confident that he knows me and in turn knows whats best.

holiness.

we sing songs about holiness being what we long for and what we need.

but it is something we can and will never fully achieve.

even so we must live our life in pursuit of holiness.

its really hard for my mind to wrap around that.

And they were calling to one another:

"Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty;

the whole earth is full of his glory."

isaiah 6:3

the word holy in this passage comes from the Greek word קָדוֹשׁ, which literally means pure or clean.

it is only by the grace of God that i will ever be viewed that way. but all i know is that i can strive for holiness, with the knowledge that i'll fall short, and simply take it day by day.

something i was challenged with this morning was the difference between kindness and goodness. at a glance, they seem synonymous, but when you dig deeper, you see that even though you need one to have the other, they are quite different.

"kindness is a sincere desire for the happiness of others; goodness is the activity calculated to advance that happiness...kindness is the inner disposition and goodness is kindness is action"

-jerry bridges the fruitful life

also...

i dont know what im going to do a month from now without these kiddos and their water fights, tray nights, dance moves, and just plain silliness.

wanderings of the mind.

they're bound to happen when one is as tired as i am. nevertheless. here's what im thinkin

1. i still like the disney channel
2. ive been really brave today, i killed two yucky bugs and caught a lizard in my mom's bedroom
3. i wish i could successfully pull a tablecloth out from underneath a beautifully set table
4. i leave in four days for what has the potential for being one of the greatest adventures of my life
5. im glad i just had my favorite late night snack peanut butter captain crunch
6. i could reeeeaaaallly use a manicure
7. tomorrow is going to be a lovely day
8. i love continuing to learn about GRACE
9. im sore from running more that i have in quite some time, yessssss
10. i cant wait until my clothes are back from the dry cleaners
11. I GET TO SEE MY BROTHER for three whole days
12. im intimidated by the garage sale happening at my house this weekend
13. im thankful for my fathers indian heritage
14. i miss skype dates, like tonight.
15. i rely on the word of god, through all things

"Trust in the lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take."

proverbs 3:5-6

i love that trusting in the lord is all i have to do. thats all. granted, not an easy task, by any means, but in the past few weeks ive picked up this new tendency to over analyze. really, i mean reeeaaaaly, its not up to me, or my elaborate plans, or rationalizations. sure god has the ability to bless some half thought out mediocre plan, and work it together for good. but i dont want something that has to be worked together and turned into good, id rather have gods perfect will, please and thank you. so for the time being im going to stop worrying about the future so much and enjoy the awesome blessings before me right now. im happy, like REAL happy, and i can find rest in the fact that if i continue to seek his will in all i do, he will direct my ways.

also...

i wish i could go see two of my roommates who are in the same city as me at this very moment.